GHOSTWOOD 034: "Twin Peaks in Pop Culture" is Up!

"That's right!  I'm the one."
"I'm talking to Audrey."
"I've got pictures, see?  Here's me about to kill her.  Here's me killing her.  Here's me wrapping her in plastic."

-- Leo "The Murderer of Laura Palmer" Johnson (Chris Farley) and Dale Cooper (Kyle MacLachlan), Saturday Night Live: "Twin Peaks" 

It is happening again...My co-host with the most Xan Sprouse and I are back with a new episode of Ghostwood: The Twin Peaks Podcast!  This time, we discuss the 1990 Saturday Night Live sketch parody of Twin Peaks featuring host Kyle MacLachlan, along with the various Twin Peaks parody sketches, homages and references from pop culture!

LET'S ROCK!

In our latest episode, Xan and I discuss things like creating bonus content for our Patreon subscribers, the third great age of Saturday Night Live, Leo being the Chad of his day, Kyle MacLachlan's SNL host monologue, Xan finally becoming a Princess Bride fan, the various home video releases of Twin Peaks and Star Wars, Xan's crush on Chris Farley, Victoria Jackson's homage to Sherilyn Fenn's cherry stem knot, Mike Myers as the Little Man from Another Place, Northern Exposure's "Russian Flu" and the show as a quirky TV replacement for Twin Peaks, Xan's crush on Chris-in-the-Morning, Cookie Monster and Sesame Street's "Twin Beaks", Darkwing Duck's "Twin Beaks", The Simpsons episodes "Who Shot Mr. Burns (Part Two)" and "Lisa's Sax", the Fringe episodes "Northwest Passage", "The Firefly" and "Immortality", Fringe and Twin Peaks sharing the same TV universe, the Scooby-Doo: Mystery Incorporated episodes "Stand and Deliver" and "Nightmare in Red", the movie Living in Oblivion, Peter Dinklage, Kyle MacLachlan on Late Night with Seth Meyers and The Late, Late Show with James Corden, the Simpsons "Steamed Hams" parody, and more!

If you'd like to check out our latest episode, you can find us on...

iTunes -- RIGHT HERE

Direct MP3 downloads/Libsyn -- RIGHT HERE

YouTube -- RIGHT HERE

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Ghostwood's Twitter account

Be sure to come back in two weeks as Xan and I attempt our first commentary episode as we watch "Traces to Nowhere", the second episode from Twin Peaks Season One!  Look for more of Ghostwood: The Twin Peaks Podcast on iTunes, YouTube, Libsyn, and the official Southgate Media Group website!

Adam Driver Reprises Kylo Ren for SNL STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS Sketch

What happens when Kylo Ren goes Undercover Boss at Starkiller Base?

That was the joke premise of the Star Wars: The Force Awakens sketch on last night's Saturday Night Live, hosted by star Adam Driver.  Reprising his role of the villainous Kylo Ren for the four-minute, forty-second sketch "Star Wars Undercover Boss: Starkiller Base," Driver was joined by SNL regulars Taran Killam, Bobby Moynihan, and Leslie Jones in a mashup of The Force Awakens and the CBS series Undercover Boss.  


The sketch opens at Starkiller Base, the planet-sized weapon of the First Order.  Kylo Ren is the group's commander and is described as going undercover among Base personnel as "Matt, a radar technician."

"You get so caught up in restoring the galaxy to its rightful state that you miss what's going on behind the scenes," explains Ren to the camera.  "I'm looking forward to having some real talk with some real folks."

With hidden cameras in an employee common area, "Matt" engages his fellow Base personnel.  He sits down with Tim the 501st Legion Stormtrooper (Moynihan) and Zack, a First Order Lieutenant Colonel (Killam) and asks them if they like working at Starkiller Base and what they think of Kylo Ren.  "Do you guys believe when he says he's going to finish what Darth Vader started?"

"What exactly has he started?" asks the Stormtrooper.

"You know, I will say this for Kylo," remarks Zack, "I think he gets a bad rap.  Yeah, he's trying to accomplish something that's never been done in the history of the galaxy.  You know, rule everything?  That's impressive, I admire the guy."

"Yes!" Matt exclaims.  "Exactly!  Exactly!"

In the next scene, Ren is given the task by his supervisor (Jones) to rewire a calcinator. The task appears difficult for Ren to accomplish, incurring the anger of his supervisor.

"Okay, now can we rewire it, please," Ren's supervisor tells him, "so I can go have my muffin?  I haven't had my muffin yet, Matt!"

Matt returns to the common area and asks Zack and Tim if they've seen Kylo Ren's cross-hilt lightsaber.

"Yeah, man," replies Tim.  "That thing's weird looking."

"No, it's not, it's awesome," Ren counters testily.  Matt returns with Kylo Ren's lightsaber and activates it, holding it right up to Tim's face.  "Look at it up close!" Ren shouts.

"That thing looks dangerous, man, poorly made, a little kid made it."

"Then you don't have to look at it anymore!" Ren snaps, hurling the lightsaber across the room until it crashes into a wall.

"I'm 90% sure Matt is Kylo Ren," Zack tells the camera in a separate interview.

Zack tells Matt about his rough year after losing his son in the Stormtrooper program, which affects Ren.  He tells the camera, "Hearing that Zack lost his son really struck a nerve with me...especially since I'm the one who killed him."

Matt approaches Zack, saying that he ran into Kylo Ren in the bathroom.  Matt gives Zack a card from Ren, which says "After the rain comes the rainbow," with a note from Ren that reads "Sorry I killed your son!  :( -- Kylo"

Back in the common area, Matt, Zack and Tim are having lunch once again. "A buddy of mine saw Kylo Ren take his shirt off in the shower," Ren says.  "And he said Kylo Ren had an 8-pec.  Kylo Ren was shredded."

Tim snickers at the suggestion, remarking "What?  Your friend's a liar, man. Kylo Ren is a punk bitch.  That guy looks like he weighs thirty pounds soaking wet underneath that little black dress."

As Tim begins laughing, he suddenly starts choking uncontrollably.  "Oh, no...He's choking on food," Ren remarks dryly.  Ren raises his hand, using the Force to lift Tim up into the air. "I see what's in your mind," he says to Tim.  "It.  Is.  Stupid!"  All at once, Tim goes flying across the room into a nearby soda machine.

"Dude, Matt straight up sucks," Tim tells the camera privately.  

"I have a bombshell announcement to make, guys," Ren remarks to everyone in the common area.  "I'm not Matt.  I'm --"

"You're Kylo Ren," reply Zack and Tim.  "I knew when you threw me through the soda machine," remarks Tim.  "I knew from 'Hi, I'm Matt,'" says Zack.

"We really connected today," Ren says to Zack.  "I'm promoting you to Superior Officer."

"I had a blast today," Ren tells the camera, now fully garbed in his mask and hooded cloak. "I really learned a lot, and people are gonna love the new me."  As Kylo Ren walks away from the camera, we see the lifeless body of Zack slumped against the wall behind him.

If you'd like to check out the full sketch, you can view it below thanks to the official Saturday Night Live account on YouTube...

SNL Mocks Marvel Not Giving Black Widow Her Own Movie

Well, on the plus side, Marvel Comics' Black Widow finally got own movie.  On the down side, it turned out to be a rom-com.

Last night, NBC's Saturday Night Live rather brilliantly skewered Marvel Studios' sexism when it comes to female superheroes, with the help of host Scarlett Johansson -- none other than Black Widow herself.

In the three-minute movie parody sketch "Black Widow: Age of Me," SNL addressed the growing complaints that leading female Avenger Black Widow has not received her own solo film, while satirizing the movie industry's treatment of women in romantic comedies ("rom-com"s) in the process.

The sketch opens with a dramatic voiceover, which begins, "You love the Marvel Universe -- Avengers: Age of Ultron, Thor, Captain America, Iron Man -- but you wanna know, why no Black Widow movie?  Does Marvel not know how to make a girl superhero movie?  Chill. Marvel gets women."

The trailer for Black Widow: Age of Me commences, with the tone abruptly shifting to typical rom-com trailer music and Voiceover Guy continuing, "When it came to life in the big city, Black Widow had it all figured out..."

Johannson, reprising her role as Black Widow with a pink sweater, breaks one of her high heels while walking New York City streets and grumbles, "Remind me to call whoever invented high heels and leave them a nasty message!"

We're shown Black Widow's huge apartment, great friends (Beck Bennett as Captain America and Jay Pharoah as Nick Fury eating chinese takeout with Black Widow), and an internship at Fashion Weekly.  Black Widow's boss wonders where the new girl is as Black Widow backflips into the office.  Looking over her outfit, Black Widow's boss remarks, "Leather...with a low neckline?  Take that off..." (record scratch) "...and put it on the cover of our magazine."

"The only thing missing in Black Widow's life," continues Voiceover Guy, "was love."  While walking through Central Park, Black Widow accidentally gets tangled up in a group of small dogs and apologizes for being a clutz.  The owner of the dogs turns out to be Ultron, decked out in a blazer with a tie.  Ultron asks Black Widow out for coffee, which she replies, "I don't really have any time to date any guys now, so..."  "What about robots?" asks Ultron, making Black Widow smile.

When then see Black Widow back at her apartment, this time with her stereotypical gay friend, Thor (Taran Killam), who asks her who the guy is she's interested in.  "What makes you think there's always a guy, Thor?"  "Honey," replies Thor, "you're putting ketchup on your cereal."

"From Marvel Studios," continues Voiceover Guy as Black Widow and Ultron have a picnic together, "and the writers of 27 Dresses, comes the story of a superhero...and her super-romance."  Black Widow and Ultron are shown starting to take their clothes off to have sex, until Widow pauses at the sight of Ultron's glowing...um...equipment.  "Penis activated," announces Ultron, making Black Widow smile with anticipation.

"I think you're moving way too fast with this Ultron guy," advises Nick Fury, still eating chinese takeout.

"Does he even know anything about you?" asks Captain America.  "Like, that your favorite food is ice cream?"

Thor walks into the living room, wearing only his glasses and a bath towel tucked above his chest.  "Hey, B.W.?  Your boyfriend is on the news..."

Cecily Strong as CNN TV news reporter Cheryl Fishman announces that Ultron has destroyed the Fashion Weekly building.  "...as a robot named Ultron threw a bus at the Fashion Weekly building and I'd hate to be that guy's girlfriend."

Black Widow cries and shakes her head in disbelief at the news report, as sad music plays over a montage of Black Widow crying on the couch.  Another CNN report shows footage of Ultron leaving the apologetic words "I'm sorry" with fire across another building.  Ultron shows up at her apartment, with Black Widow scolding him for costing her a job and asking him if he even knows what her favorite food is.  "Uh...Pizza?" replies Ultron.  "Thank you," counters Black Widow, knocking Ultron out with a roundhouse kick.

We see Black Widow loading up her car with suitcases as Voiceover Guy continues, "For Black Widow, falling in love can be hard but it can also be...incredible."  The Hulk (Bobby Moynihan) shows up, asking Black Widow "Where you go?"

"Paris.  France," replies Black Widow, slamming the trunk shut.

"But if you go Paris," asks the Hulk, "then who help Hulk eat ice cream?"  The Hulk holds up two cones of ice cream, making Black Widow smile once again.

The Black Widow: Age of Me title comes up, with the film being released on Valentine's Day 2016.  "Marvel: We Know Girls."

If you'd like to see the full sketch, you can view it below thanks to Saturday Night Live's official YouTube account...

Chris Hemsworth Reprises Thor for SNL AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON Sketch

What happens when the Avengers celebrate their inevitable victory over Ultron on live TV?

That was the joke premise of the Avengers: Age of Ultron movie sketch on last night's Saturday Night Live, hosted by Thor and Avengers star Chris Hemsworth.  Reprising his role of the Marvel Comics superhero Thor for the three-minute, forty-second sketch, Hemsworth was joined by SNL regulars Taran Killam (Iron Man), Beck Bennett (Captain America), Pete Davidson (Bruce Banner) and Jay Pharoah (Nick Fury).  (In an interesting aside, Killam is married to actress Cobie Smulders, who played Maria Hill in The Avengers.)

This was the second major Avengers sketch for SNL, after Jeremy Renner reprised Hawkeye back in 2012.

Opening with Cecily Strong as an Action News 7 anchorwoman named Janet reporting on the breaking news of Ultron's defeat, the sketch jumps to onsite reporter named Danny Powell (Bobby Moynihan) covering the Avengers' celebration of their victory.

Hemsworth's Thor begins high-fiving the crowd behind him, whooping with joy, until Danny asks him to speak on camera.  Thor begins singing "We Are the Champions" by Queen until Danny asks him how he's feeling.  "Man, I am on pure adrenaline right now," replies Thor, "I'm at, like, an eleven!  I'm cranked up!  Woooooo!"  Thor then spotantaneously kisses Powell hard on the forehead but quickly apologizes for it being weird.

Killam's Iron Man steps in and grabs the microphone, joking about someone having a car with its lights on and a building on top of it.  Davidson's Bruce Banner comes into view next, wondering what happened while he was The Hulk.  Thor tells Bruce "You crushed it, man," which makes Bruce suddenly recall "I think I ate a guy."  "You did!" laughs Thor.  "You ate a bunch of guys, you nut!"

Thor begins doing the Running Man dance until Pharoah's Nick Fury is brought on camera. Fury tells Danny that Ultron does not still pose a threat, until Thor and Iron Man sneak up behind Fury and dump a cooler of Gatorade on him.  Thor tells everyone that it was "Stark's idea."

Bennett's Captain America arrives to speak to the Action News 7 viewers, telling them to stay in their homes per the New York mayor's order because many buildings are unsafe and fires are not yet contained.  Thor, however, can't help but mock Captain America's serious tone from behind.

When asked by Janet about the extent of the damage and when people might return to their homes, Danny responds that he doesn't know but says that Thor told him that the victory party will be held at a Dave & Busters on 9th Street and there might be some late-night karaoke.

Thor then gives a shoutout to his brother Loki, acknowledging the two have had their differences in the past when Loki tried to take over the world, but he still loves him anyway. He then does another shoutout to his ex-girlfriend Jane Foster, telling her "How do you like me now?! Ooooo!"  Lastly, Thor tells everyone to check out his podcast on Soundcloud.  "It's sick!  Sick, sick, sick...Oh, and I'm sorry we destroyed the city.  I love my life!  Wooooo!"

If you'd like to check out the full sketch, you can view it below thanks to BroBible after the short ad...

SNL Hungers for a Decent WALKING DEAD Sketch

In the zombie apocalypse, the fear of being considered racist is more important than the fear of the undead.

Yes, that was the so-called joke premise of Saturday Night Live's parody sketch of AMC's The Walking Dead that aired last night.  Featuring comedian Kevin Hart as host, the episode aired a nearly four-minute sketch with SNL regulars Bill Hader (Daryl Dixon), Taran Killam (Rick Grimes), Nasim Pedrad (Carl Grimes) and Kate McKinnon (Maggie Greene).

The sketch opens with the group on the move but stopping for a night's rest.  "All right, we'll camp out here for the night and head back for the others in the morning," begins Rick.  "Be careful, this place is probably crawling with walkers."

"Dad, you want me to take first watch?" offers Carl.  "I'm twelve now, so I'm totally ready to kill.  I'm good at killing and I feel emotionally fine after I do it."

At that moment, the group hears some rustling and aims their weapons in the direction of an African-American man who begs them not to shoot.  "My name is Lyle," he says, "and I don't want any trouble.  I'm just trying to survive the zombie apocalypse."

Rick asks Lyle if he's been bitten, which he denies, so Rick asks Lyle to hold on for a moment while he conferences with his group about taking in a stranger.  Of course, while the group turns away to conference, Lyle is bitten in the neck by a zombie, played by SNL cast member Tim Robinson.

Rick informs Lyle, "All right, we've decided to let you camp with us tonight, but know this, Lyle -- If you get bitten by a walker, I will not hesitate to kill you."

"Or I'll do it," interrupts Carl.  "I shot my own mom when she was turning into a zombie...and it didn't screw up my head at all."

Lyle thanks the group but begins to growl uncontrollably for a moment, causing the group to aim their weapons once again.  Lyle shrugs off the growl.

"You're one of them," remarks Rick.

"Excuse me?" asks an offended Kyle.  "One of them?  Oh, my God...This is so racist right now!"

Rick quickly and awkwardly denies the accusation.  "No, no, we're not racist.  It just seemed like you were turning into a zombie."

"Oh, okay, I see how it is.  So when someone comes from a different cultural background than you, they're automatically a zombie.  That's what you're telling me?"

Rick continues to deny the accusation of racism and asks Maggie to help their new friend get some water.  Lyle begins to follow Maggie but growls again and starts dragging his left leg.

"Hey, you didn't have a bum leg when we first met you, did you, fella?" asks Daryl suspiciously.

"Okay, you ain't never seen a classic pimp walk before?" replies Lyle.  "It's called swag, son!"  Lyle then proceeds to rotate around to demonstrate and Daryl apologizes for the confusion.

Carl notices that Lyle is eating Maggie by the neck, and after Rick pulls Lyle off of her, Lyle looks around innocently at the others and asks what's wrong.

"You're eating our friend," Daryl responds.

"Oh, okay, I'm sorry, would you rather I just eat some fried chicken or some watermelon?"

Daryl apologizes again, causing Rick to sigh in exasperation.  "Well, we're terrible people."

"Dad, that guy's a zombie," Carl exclaims.  "I mean, come on, he's doing the Thriller dance."

"Carl, Thriller is a very special dance for many African-Americans."

"This is ridiculous, Dad!  His foot fell off!"

"Diabetes," Lyle explains.

"See?  Diabetes," Rick says to Carl.  "Are you embarrassed?  You should be.  Carl, we're going to accept Lyle with all his differences."

At that moment, Lyle growls again and lunges at the group.  "Rrrrr!  White people brains!"

Carl takes out and shoots Lyle through the head.  "Told you he was a zombie."

"Good work, Carl," replies Rick.  "I knew we weren't racists.  Let's move."

The three turns to leave, but Daryl has one final concern.  "Uh, can we discuss the fact that Maggie just died...?"

If you'd like to check out the sketch, you can check out below thanks to Hulu...

Jeremy Renner Reprises Hawkeye for SNL AVENGERS Sketch

How useful is Hawkeye when he runs out of arrows?

That was the joke premise of the somewhat disappointing Avengers movie sketch on last night's Saturday Night Live, hosted by Avengers star Jeremy Renner.  Reprising his role of the Marvel Comics superhero Hawkeye for the four-minute sketch, Renner was joined by SNL regulars Bill Hader (Thor), Jason Sudeikis (Iron Man), Taran Killam (Captain America), Kate McKinnon (Black Widow), Bobby Moynihan (The Hulk), Jay Pharoah (Nick Fury) and Vanessa Bayer (Maria Hill).  (In an interesting aside, Killam is married to actress Cobie Smulders, who played Maria Hill in The Avengers.)

Opening with Maria Hill warning Nick Fury of the "Chintauri" (sic) invasion of Earth through the portal that Loki opened with the Tesseract, Nick Fury calls for the Avengers to assemble.  When Hill questions Fury using an archer, Fury replies, "Yeah, like a bow-and-arrow dude."

"Like...Super arrows?"

"Nah, normal arrows.  He's just really, really good at it."

Cutting to the Avengers in the midst of the New York City battleground, Captain America calls for Hawkeye to do his thing.  Hawkeye awkwardly pauses, explaining "I'm out of arrows."

"What?" asks Cap.

"I'm all out of arrows.  I don't have any more.  So...I guess I'm done, right?  I'll be in the car, stay safe..."

When Black Widow asks Hawkeye how many arrows he brought, he answers "All of them...Like, eleven."

Cap is naturally stunned.  "Eleven?  There are a hundred thousand aliens out there."

"And I killed eleven of them, you're welcome.  My arrow thing only holds eleven -- twelve if I really cram them in there but it's not safe.  Anyway, good luck."

The battle sort-of continues, with Iron Man returning with a plan to fend off the invasion.  "All right, here's what we do.  We can shut down the generator.  All we need is a direct hit through an arrow-sized core.  It's a little tiny hole, so take the shot, Hawkeye."

"He's out of arrows," sighs Cap.

"Aw, come on, Hunger Games!" says the irritated Iron Man.  "What are you doing?  Just pull arrows out of the aliens you already shot, Katniss."

"It's not sanitary," explains Hawkeye.

Later, after Hawkeye injures his bow-pulling fingers fist-bumping the Hulk, he apologies and says he wishes he could've been more help.  "Maybe you can," says Captain America.  "Hulk, grab him."  The Hulk proceeds to swing Hawkeye around in a circle, smacking each of the approaching Chitauri with the archer's body, saving the day.

If you'd like to see the sketch, you can view it below thanks to user Mafalda on MetaTube (feel free to ignore the mute commercial at the beginning)...

Katy Perry's Boobs Are Back to Destroy Your Children!

From the season premiere of Saturday Night Live...

And in an Elmo t-shirt no less!  Is nothing sacred?  Something must be done to...errrrr, about Katy's breasts before civilization as we know it is completely lost forever!  Think of the childrens!  THE CHILDRENS!!!